If You Can’t Win At The Game, Change The Game

At a recent dinner a woman and I were talking about women in tech.  She brought up a story about a young woman who was the only woman in her department.  One of her male co-workers dropped $2 every day into her cubicle.  He did it to diminish her – to make her feel like a sex object.

Ladies – Supporting an Issue Isn’t Enough!

Recently I read through the Action Plan of a women’s organization I was interested in joining.  As I read, I kept wondering what action I am supposed to take?  What am I supposed to do? This is a huge problem women have. We have ideas, principles and values.  Let’s call these Abstract

Do Men Hate Conflict More Than Women?

Women are taught to think of men as tough and aggressive.  But then we work with men and discover that most men hate conflict.  They run away from it…literally. Have you noticed that Trump, in spite of his tough, confrontational television “You’re fired!” persona, fires by tweet? It’s

4 Ways To Explain the Unique Value of Women

Many women don’t really understand the real tangible value women bring to the workplace.  This is because we are led to believe that for all of the centuries women were not part of the workforce, the all-male workplace functioned just fine.  The proof of that is in all of its accompli

Be More Than Just the “Smart Girl”

At the end of last year I noticed a big trend in media – to treat women as “smart girls” and emphasize that we do better academically than men.  I am not sure what the purpose of this is but I do know it won’t help advance women in the workplace because it reinforces an old stereotype

Men Have Liberty, Women Have License

Men and women have very different perceptions of empowerment and freedom.  Women are taught that they are something we are granted by those with power.  We are taught that men have always had them.  I saw this view expressed in a comment by a young woman who wrote “White men have neve

You Got a Degree But, Can You Get a Job?

Congratulations Women!  We are now earning 57% of the college degrees!!  Whoo-hooo!  We will soon close that nasty wage gap and have equal representation in the workplace all the way up to the board room.  Right? Not quite. When we focus just on getting a degree, any degree, we ignore

Women, Conformity, Validation and Confidence

It is common to hear that in comparison to men, women lack confidence and therefore seek more validation.   I’ve never believed this was a natural trait of women but a product of our conditioning.  As we grow from girls into women that conditioning is continuously reinforced so throug

Finding Solutions to Advance Women

In order to advance women in the workplace, women need solutions for the unique issues and challenges we face.  That is why I started this website – there weren’t enough women who had been deep into the male-dominated workplace sharing the lessons they learned on how to work with men

Women Need Solutions, Not More Studies

When women need career advice our first instinct is to look on the internet.  This is what I did a few years ago.  I successfully broke through a barrier that read, “No Women Past This Point” and I knew I could go further.  I just needed help to get there. After a few hours of reading

Everything I Needed to Know About Bullying I Learned in First Grade

If you haven’t figured it out from reading my articles, I believe in women standing up for themselves.  I believe women can stand up to anybody and to institutional power.  After thinking about why I feel so strongly about this, I realized I learned this powerful lesson in the first g

Find Your Niche, Find Your Personal Fulfillment

Have you ever noticed that people become really successful when they stop doing what other people say they should do and start doing things their way? There is something attractive and empowering about a person who is truly authentic.  I think a lot of it has to do with the way they p

Have You Thought About Female Doctors This Way?

When we think of female physicians, we think of specialties such as pediatrics, obstetrics and gynecology, family practice and veterinary.  Anyone with older parents may also add geriatric medicine to the list of the medical professions women choose to go into. If you think about why

It Isn’t Always About Power

The current narrative says that all  unwanted sexual attention and harassment is based in power.  It isn’t. Sometimes it is simply about sex. I’ve never had unwanted attention from or been sexually harassed or abused by any man I work for.  One senior manager may have wanted to but I

From #MeToo to Action

After reading an article I got in a comment battle with another woman over how women should respond to sexual harassment and assault.  She was very focused on offering empathy and sitting up all night with a woman who has been hurt.  To her offering empathy and understanding is what e

Embrace Your Quirks

The true secret to success is being yourself – your true authentic self, full of strengths, weakness and quirks. We all gladly embrace our strengths.  We love to show them off.  But we should also be proud of our weaknesses and quirks because through them we find real strength. Embrac

The HUGE Misperception Women Have About The Male-Dominated Workplace

Women have a HUGE misperception about the male-dominated workplace that has done incredible damage to our efforts to advance. Women work from a narrative that says men want to climb to the top so they can have power over others.  Many women believe men aspire to control and dominate o

Women Do More Than Create Balance

When we talk about how women influence the male-dominated workplace we often say that women create balance.  But that isn’t very impactful and it doesn’t portray the full power of women. When we think of women balancing men we equate it to men going too far and women tempering their e

Seeing and Believing In the Equality of Women

What value do women, bring to the workplace? For centuries the accepted answer was “None.”  Even today most of us can still only give a vague answer.  We hear that companies with more women perform better but we can’t specifically state why that is.  Without a clear answer, women don’

How Women Should Navigate the Drinking Culture

There are some industry cultures that endorse a drinking culture – frequently getting together after work to drink. Coming from one such industry I understand how it normalizes alcoholism and creates problems for women. Many women and women’s organization encourage women to participat