Assert Your Female Perspective

As women we often hear things that don’t represent our female perspective.  We recognize them because they don’t sound quite right to us.  But, instead of speaking up and questioning it, we let it go.  We do this because we believe that the other person knows more than us and if we question them then we will reveal our ignorance.

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Recently, I saw quote by Sheryl Sandberg that is a great example of what I am talking about.  Now, I want you to be honest in your reaction to this quote.
Here it is:

“I look forward to the day when half our homes are run by men and half our companies and institutions are run by women.

When that happens, it won’t just mean happier women and families; it will mean more successful businesses and better lives for all.”

Does part of you say you get what she is talking about?  It looks like this is what makes things fair and equal between men and women.

But do you also have a feeling and little voice inside of you telling you something isn’t quite right?.

Many of us will dismiss our feelings because Sheryl is more successful in her career than of us.  And, we assume she knows more than us. We don’t even consider that Sheryl may have some things wrong.

But, as women, every time we have that feeling that something isn’t quite right, that is what we need to focus in on.  We need to dig into those feeling because when we do that we are going to discover a greater wisdom.  So lets do that with Sheryl’s quote .

Now the first thing that bothers us about Sheryl’s quote is that she presents equality mathematically.  At first it sounds good because we see the Pink side as equal to the Blue side which means Women are equal to Men.

But then we realize that in math things are equal because the are the same and interchangeable.  So is Sheryl telling us that men and women are the same and interchangeable?

It sounds like it.  She is telling us that we will have equality when women become as ambitious as men so they can run the workplace and when men become as nurturing as women so they can run the home

To most of us that doesn’t sound quite right.  But, it also brings up the second thing that bothers us about her quote.  She uses the term “run by.”

“Run by” means that there is one dominant person in charge, making the decisions. And if we think about it, this isn’t the type of equality we want especially in the home.

Women want an equality where men and women are complimentary and equal halves of the whole.  An equality where men and women work together.

And it makes us realize what really bothers us about Sheryl’s quote: It sounds very male.

Seeing equality mathematically is very male.

The term “run by” is definitely male.

All this maleness makes her quote feel cold to us because it doesn’t recognize the nuance of differences between men and women.  And we realize that what really bothers us is that her quote doesn’t reflect the warmth of our female perspective.

As women we often hear things like this quote that don’t sound quite right to us because it only represents the male perspective of the world.  This happens even when the idea is presented to us by a woman.

You see the world outside the home was designed by men.  And many women like Sheryl were taught to fit into this male version and accept that it is the whole and complete perspective.  They don’t recognize that their female perspective is missing.

This is why every time we hear something that doesn’t feel or sound quite right, we have to dig deeper and explore if our female perspective is missing.

We also have to remember that Real Equality is achieved when women assert our female perspective in both the home and the workplace.   And in real equality men and women work together in wholeness.

When we achieve this kind of equality, that’s when we create more successful homes and workplaces.  And happier and healthier lives for all.