Tag: leader

  • From Little Girl to Leader

    From Little Girl to Leader

    I’ve been anticipating it and it finally happened.  Someone, (Ed Rollins) called Alexandria Ocasio Cortez “little girl.”

    Of course, AOC thought the comment was pure misogyny.  And her response probably caused lots of old guys to chuckle and shake their heads saying, “Oh little girl, you have so much to learn.”

    Obviously, there is a huge generation gap at play but in this case the “little girl” moniker is something AOC shouldn’t dismiss.  It’s a warning she should heed.

    Remember when Trump called Marco Rubio “Little Marco?”  It wasn’t a reference to his hand size or the size of anything else.  The slam meant that Rubio was still wet behind his ears.  He didn’t have the breadth of experience to be President.  Sure, Rubio had a lot of political policy positions, but he lacked real-world experience.  He was never responsible for executing his policy positions or accountable for their results.

    Rubio didn’t experience the hard knocks, leaving him green and untried.  Trump picked up on this created the “Little Marco” nickname.

    But Trump also gave him some respect.  He didn’t call him “Little Boy Marco.”

    Being called “little boy” or “little girl” means you don’t have the basic the knowledge to come up with good ideas.  It means you still need to learn how the world and your workplace function before you open your mouth and express your ideas.

    We are all “little boys” and “little girls” in the beginning of our careers.  Even though we have a college or technical degree, we haven’t applied our education out in the real world.  Therefore, we haven’t discovered the many ways our book learning fails against the realities of the world.

    We need to spend our early years wisely because what we learn in these years sets the path for the rest of our career.  We need to tackle challenging assignments and experience the hard knocks.  This is how we us learn and grow.  But most importantly, it’s how we earn respect.

    AOC needs that experience.  When she answers questions, her gaffs reveal how much she still has to learn.  So, she needs to spend the next few years quietly learning, challenging herself and growing.

    But unfortunately, she is in the social media spotlight.  And she may be confusing media popularity with respect.  She needs some old school mentors to pull her out of the spotlight, take her under their wing and challenge her.

    If she expects to be taken seriously, her ideas have to do more than sound and feel good.  She must make them complete and feasible.  She needs to figure out how to make them work in the real world.  Then she must have the courage to present them and be held accountable for their execution and their outcome.

    This is how it works in the real world for anyone, man or woman, who wants to be a leader.

    Empowered Women Don’t Stay “Little Girls”

  • Leading From Within – A Leadership Style for Women

    Leading From Within – A Leadership Style for Women

    A common response from women to my website tagline “Empowering Women to Lead the Male-Dominated Workplace” is:

    “I don’t want to lead men.”

    I often wonder why I get that response. Can it be their perception of leadership?

    When we think of leadership, we typically picture a leader who is out in front of his followers.   He is the leader because he was confident enough to step forward, put himself in front of the group and convince them that he knows what to do. Being a leader is a vulnerable position. People often disagree with you and tell you that you are wrong. They challenge you. Some people want to replace you in your leadership position in order to advance themselves or their point of view. Being a leader isn’t easy so I understand why many women don’t want to lead and especially don’t want to lead a group of men.

    But are we only looking at leadership from a male perspective? Is this why women hesitate to lead?

    How can women use their perspective to be leaders?

    As a project manager I was the project leader. I saw myself as the hub of a wheel, coordinating the activities of various functions, departments and personnel who are connected to me through the spokes of the wheel. Unlike our typical perception of a leader, I am not out in front of everyone, I am amongst everyone. Unlike a male perspective of leadership I am not using a hierarchy to give me power over people. Instead I am using a woman’s circular perspective. Standing amongst people presumes leadership gives us as power with people. I am empowered and every member of my team is empowered.

    In project and complex environments, a leader oversees many tasks or functions. The leader isn’t an expert in each one and can’t develop the solution to every problem or the answer to each new situation on his own. The leader must rely on the input of others. When the leader is on top of a hierarchy, interaction is limited and information is filtered as it makes its way to the leader. This style of leadership doesn’t produce the best solution.

    Using a circular perspective, standing amongst people interaction is not limited. The role of the leader is not to direct the solution or answer but to draw out the collective expertise of the group and integrate ideas in order to derive the best course of action. Standing amongst people requires collaboration, synergy, integration and coordination, all traits that women excel in.

    To become comfortable with asserting our leadership, we start by being a good team member. People are assigned to a team because they have skills and expertise the team needs. Each team member steps forward with their skills each time they recognize the team needs them. Team members can’t sit back and wait to be called upon because the leader and other team members may not know the skills are needed. Whenever a team member takes action that impacts another team member, the impacted team member is responsible for stepping forward and letting the team know how they are impacted. To have a fully functioning team, each team member must exercise leadership.

    When we see our workplace taking actions that adversely affects morale or performance we need to make a leadership decision. We can look at our position in the organizational hierarchy and believe we aren’t in the right position to speak up or do anything. Or, we can see ourselves as a team member with a responsibility to speak up. And of course someone with a hierarchal perspective can always challenge us or outright dismiss us. But that shouldn’t be the reason we don’t speak up. In my experience it often comes back to bite them and I find I am listened to a little bit more the next time. So even though there was a delay and the step forward small, my leadership had an impact. We shouldn’t believe that leadership is only about creating a big impact. Leadership is also exercised to make the slow, step-by-step journey of moving in a new direction.

    Leadership is about change. Anyone who wants to change the status quo or wants to improve the status quo must see themselves as a leader. Non-leaders accept things as they are even if they don’t like them. To be a leader you must believe that you have the right to express your point of view and believe in your point of view. That can be scary, especially when you are the only voice with that point of view. But then, that is how many great changes began.

    A good leader leads the people from above them. A great leader leads the people from within them. – M .D. Arnold

    The task of the leader is to get their people from where they are to where they have not been. – Henry Kissinger

    Empowered Women Get Paid Their Worth

    For a more about the difference in leadership styles, watch this YouTube video:

  • How To Use The Power Seat

    I introduced the concept of the power seat and told you how to find it in your conference room in my article Understanding the Power Seat.  Now it is time to learn how to use it so you can take lead a discussion and lead your collegues to better solutions. (more…)