As I write my articles I find myself correcting my writing based upon the counseling session I had with a manager many years ago.  He did not like it when I referred to my direct reports as “My Team.”  He wanted me to say “The Team”.  I didn’t like saying that.  Even as I write today, I find myself changing “my” to “the” and back again.

So the question I’ve struggled with is – which is correct to say – “My Team” OR “The Team?”

I understand my manager’s reasoning for saying “The Team.”  To him, “My Team” sounds like I own them.  It sounds like I am a dictator.  In order to convey teamwork, he liked “The Team.”

His analogy was that we were a baseball team with each person having their position to play.  He believed that if each person did their job we functioned well as a team.  If one person messed up, then somehow “The Team” protected them.Team 4

I didn’t see it that way.  I thought the baseball concept left “My Team” members vulnerable.  It is too easy to point fingers at the pitcher, or first baseman and blame him/her for a bad play.

To me, saying “The Team” shows a disconnection between myself and the people I supervise.  What was important to me was to demonstrate that I am their leader, I am out in front, I take responsibility for them and I stand up for them.  If anyone criticized anyone in the department they had to come through me.

Team 1My analogy was that I would not talk about my daughters, mother, father, brother, sister, nieces and nephews by saying “The Family.”  I always say “My Family.”

I am part of them!

I suspect our different perceptions was a gender issue.  He was concerned that each player/team member had autonomy over their position.  He wanted us to be equalitarian.  I was more concerned about the connections between all of the team members and how the interaction between the team member’s impacted the entire department’s performance.

He saw individuals.  I saw one entity.

We went back and forth on this issue for many months but I now consider the issue settled.  I decided that since this is “My Blog”, then I’m gonna say “My Team.”

Empowered women are not dictators and can say      “My Team.”

I want to hear your thoughts and opinions so leave a comment!!

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